One thing I've been struggling with as a blogger, as an employee and as a person in general is "Do I Make a Difference?" I'm sure it's something that lots of people think about it...and maybe I think about it more than the normal person. I really want what I do in life to make a difference. I don't doubt that I'm making a difference in E's life...I see that everyday in him growing and changing. I see it in his vocabulary and his personality, but what about in the rest of my life?
I'm still pretty new to blogging...a lot newer than most of the blogs I read. My numbers aren't always the highest, but I have devoted readers. I get some of the best comments from readers and I really do have some of the sweetest people write to me. That should be enough for me. I love being able to reach one person with something that I write...something I'm feeling, something I'm struggling with. That's the reason I blog. I want to make a difference in someone's life through writing. I love writing. I find great freedom in writing because you can express yourself in a way that you couldn't otherwise. Sometimes when I'm running, I think about what I'm going to write about next. I sometimes think so quickly that I have a hard time saying the words out loud (maybe that's why I'm so self-conscious of public speaking) but I have a much easier time getting it on paper. So, do I make a difference in blogging? Maybe. Maybe if I just reach one person a day then I've done my job. Sure, I'd love to have 1,000s of readers that I can reach, but right now as I'm growing in my blog...I'm loving the opportunity to get to know people personally and know their stories.
So that brings me to my next question. Am I making a difference as an employee? I grew up wanting to be a writer. I knew that there wasn't much money there so I majored in the next closest thing: Public Relations. I love being able to write and persuade people in a certain direction or to help them see why a certain way is better than another. I work part-time for a university and do public relations and graphic design. I don't always see the effects of my work and perhaps that is why it's so hard for me to know if I'm making a difference. A lot of my work is a team effort and so I am just a tiny part of a big picture. For example, I may work on an event with a group of people...I may do the layout and design of a program, coordinate with award winners and coordinate logistics. There's no big result from the work I did alone...it's the work of all of the people that makes the difference. So as I reflect on if my work makes I difference, I have to remind myself that it does. If it weren't for one piece of the puzzle, we couldn't have a successful event. I am part of that puzzle and I am working towards a great end product. I think we expect to be acknowledged on some grand scale for our work, but that doesn't always happen. We have to take heart that what we did was part of a bigger picture that really does make a difference in the lives of others.
As a person, I hope that I'm making a great difference. I hope that my friends can walk away with something positive from me...something that makes them a better person. I don't know what they walk away with (most of the time I feel like I have a crummy attitude and they make me feel better) but surely they're getting something from me. I hope that my husband and my family also see some kind of difference in their lives from me...even if it's the smallest thing in the world.
I think we over-analyze our lives and feel like in this day and age we are expected to make a difference. With Pinterest boards we need to do something all the time. The truth is, I'm tired most of the time...I'm trying to make a difference in so many different places that it's exhausting. So if I can make a difference in the lives of my family and my child, then I feel like I've done my job. Yes, work is important, but I won't make a difference there everyday. And ultimately work is work, but family is the most important thing of all. May it be my prayer that I see the difference I'm making more often and that I can feel sure that what I'm doing is making a difference.
And you too my friends...know that whatever it is that you're doing: being a mom, being an awesome employee, being a wife/girlfriend/friend/sister/daughter you ARE making a difference. I guarantee if you ask someone, they'll point out something amazing you're doing (that you had no idea you were doing).